I love this picture for two reasons: 1) Amelia (on left) makes me (on right) feel like the happiest guy in the world. Maybe it has something to do with having the greatest girl in the world. 2) The picture was taken on a beach in Florida, where we'll be two weeks from now.

And.... I have decided that starting tomorrow I shall begin writing "Somatic," which might go through a title change. Since I'll be out of school, I co do more of what I like: watch movies, read, sleep, but I need to carpe the shit out of the diem and write!

Here I am getting arrested in 9th grade. Just kidding. This was taken when I was in 9th grade though. More maybe 10th. Oh well, I don't care. It was then and now is now. Thank God! I look so ridiculous. Check out all that gel. Actually, at the time, I used pomade. Yuck. Oh well, I don't know why I felt the need to put this here, oh yeah! I was in the orthodontist and his picture was in my file. I saw it and laughed, so I took a picture on my camera phone.

I watched a film called "The Bad and the Beautiful" a few weeks ago and literally fell in love with it. I started it really late at night and finished it in the wee hours of morning. I just couldn't bring my eyes away from the screen. I felt it was an accurate not only portrayal regarding the 1930's Hollywood, but the symbolism behind the title. This film put every single aspect under a microscope and examines the process by itself. I'm planning on writing about the film in my movie blog as soon as blogger enables my blog. For some idiotic reason, the people of blogger mistook my blog for a spam blog. I have no clue how, but I'll go ahead and get this off my chest: "Fuck you, blogger!" I bet they'll suspect this one of spam next. Well, two nights ago I watched Nick Ray's "In a Lonely Place," and while not held at the same caliber as "The Bad and the Beautiful," "In a Lonely Place" was really good as well. Another great portrayal of Hollywood, but this time it's solely through the perspective of a writer with a severe anger problem (played very well by Humphrey Bogart). I have not seen acting this great from Bogie. He typically portrays the same role in most films, but in this one, there's a lot of psychological characterization built up and projects swiftly to the suspenseful climax. Even my eyes were opened wide and jaw open. There are three lines from the movie that they make stand out:

"I was born when she kissed me.
I died when she left me.
I lived a few weeks while she loved me."

The film is comical at times, but most of it regards the turmoil some people go through and the pain and suffering one feels "in a lonely place." Again, another great symbolic title. The film, refers to Bogie's lonely place in his large Hollywood apartment, and the lonely place in his mind. The film plays well with sympathy also. Nicholas Ray is now on my top ten list of favorite filmmakers. The story is told great visually. Ray has a true craft that many fail to achieve.

Finals are this week. I finished taking my Brit Lit final today and really felt passionate about my essay. I even told him that it was one of my favorite writing challenge at Gordon and possibly ever. And I feel my allergies acting up again. Fucking cold weather. I hate it. My light show is tomorrow. I'll take pics so I can put them here. Well, I'm off to write about Islam.

I feel a lack of motivation tonight. I watched this past Thursday's "The Office" and laughed really really hard. And then went to my room and fell on my bed from exhaustion. I suddenly thought a lot about many things. Among the many was my script idea I've been lucky enough to develop into a coherent brainstorm. I got in a really great mood, came back to my computer and began making an Imix to listen while writing dialogue for my new idea, which I will go ahead and reveal the title as "Somatic." I developed the idea similarly to that of Fixation. First a title, then characters, and build a story off of that. Well, after making a list of music which took a long time, including downloading a few new tunes in order to add as well, and I suddenly grew tired after all the effort. So, I went into my room, grabbed my dream journal and began writing out my dream from the other night so I could write down the one I had last night, which involved running really fast through a train station/White hall (Emory). But after a few lines of the dream from the other night, I grew tired once again. Lynn then called to ask why I haven't seen them since their return (which was yesterday). I told her how mom and Jan were in town and I wanted to eat lunch with them. I left Amy out, because I knew that she'd jump all over that, but anyways, she got all upset and said, "You always eat lunch with them over us." After hearing that statement, I just violently laughed in my mind. It's a retarded saying. I mean retarded literally, because a normal person knows that I do not always "prefer" to eat lunch with them over dad and Lynn. Actually, you know what, a retarded person would probably know that. Lynn, on the other hand... And so after this I just felt lethargic and put my journal down, ate some lasagna, and here I am now. I want to take my emotions out in painting, like something that conveys the lack of motivation and creativity and into something motivational and creative. And so, now I'm thinking about watching John Cassavetes' "Faces" for inspiration. At least then, maybe in the morning, I'll be able to develop something. I hate feeling like this, so pathetic and useless. Time for a movie and sleep.

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to venture around Atlanta. Mom asked me a few weeks ago if I would pick Jan up from the airport and take her to a designated suite to stay for her meeting at Emory. I agreed to it and then mom called me two days ago to remind me. I drove up to the airport and drove around the circle at least eight times. It was truly fun. Every time I had to slow down, I would look off at the people exiting the airport. I felt like Travis from Taxi Driver. I should have started this off with: "April 10th, My life has taken another turn again. The days can go on with regularity over and over, one day indistinguishable from the next. A long continuous chain. Then suddenly, there is a change." And so I picked Jan up from the airport and took her to the Marriott Palace Suites. I took her luggage up for her and got to see the place. Really nice! After examining everything, she finally suggested, "not bad." I left that area and worked my way back to Covington. Instead of getting on 85, which would lead me to 75. which would lead me to 285, which would lead me to 20, (and with each interstates bumper traffic), instead, I decided to go a back way through Emory and through Little 5. That led me straight to 20, where it was smooth sailing all the way to Covington. I covered up the fact that I got lost around Emory and tried calling some people for help, but then I realized that getting lost is half the fun in Atlanta and it helps me find my way the next time. And while lost, I listened to 88.5 and this really great song came on by a band called The Booze. I think that's right. But it was great being in the big city, lost and listening to great music. While on 20, I grew hungry and decided once I arrived to the square, I would stop at RL's. It was absolutely perfect. I ordered Gumbo and Pasta. It was sensational! I waited for my to-go order and walked around Covington. It was quite peaceful and relaxing. Something I haven't been getting in the last few weeks due to a hectic and painful work schedule. Speaking of that, I get to work today. Yah.... But it will be over soon. The play ends, we strike, and hopefully I keep getting paid up until the last week of school. And then it's summer. Like I said, I just have to keep thinking about summer. Well, still house sitting for dad and Lynn. They should be home tomorrow. I can't wait until tomorrow. Friday! That means then it's Saturday! Okay, that's it.

I'm so tired. That's really only the beginning of my problems. I'm not only running low on sleep every night, but I'm running low on energy. Like, it is as if I have a lack of energy and motivation. My body (specifically in my arms and my legs) is killing me. I guess it's the work that is killing my body. I never tell myself that something is too much work, and I guess that's my flaw and makes me stubborn. I just want the set done, and tell myself to do what it takes in order to get it done. But running on caffeine and soreness isn't cutting it. I'm happy doing it, but is happiness leading to aches and pains. Being tired, it makes me emotionally tiresome. Almost pitiful. I have to say though, it's quite refreshing to feel my muscles tense up when I pick up the remote. It either shows strength or weakness. I'll decide later.

I have to comment on Rocky Horror and get some things off my chest... or corset. The production itself is fantastic. Is there a good story? No, not really, but it's fun and risque. Two requirements for either having a good time or get knocked up. In this case, it works. As much beef I have with Dan, I have to say that he really did a great job directing this show. But, there are moments when he throws in what we like to call Danisms: stupid little jokes that really serve no purpose. The choreography is amazing. As much beef I have with Erin, she has truly shown off much talent as a choreographer. She however has left some of the choreography up to the individual actors, which I highly disagree with, but hey, that's showbiz. Jonathan has managed to convince me that he is this character. I completely forget it's him and think it's Frank n' Furter. The flaws of the show: some areas are poorly casted, although I must say that last night's rehearsal left me feeling a little bit easier on my disagreement with the director's choice for roles. I'm excited to film! I've discussed the matter with Dan and he approves me shooting at different angles every night. My favorite will either be the God's Eye shot or the shot up close in front of the catwalk. Being such a weird show, I'm actually glad Gordon is producing it. This is the type of thing which I've thought about before: people discovering a side to themselves, but afraid the world is going to condemn it dark and hideous. This show is definitely condemned dark and hideous, but it's fun seeing people who are really into it enjoying themselves and having fun. I don't like to dress in high heels, fishnet stalkings, and corsets, but if it makes someone happy to do so, then it's great. I have a weird feeling it's going to be worse than what I have described above. There's no telling what to expect with a show like this. All I know is that I'm not cleaning the theatre up after each show.

Well, I guess it's back to work, where I shall pull muscles and tear ligaments. Good thing summer is coming up. Ahhh, Universal! I should just keep that in mind. This is the last show of the season. If I can bite the bullet and live to work one more week, everything will be alright. My daily routine consists of waking up and going, coming home and somehow falling asleep whenever I can, waking up and going again. It's really hard. I don't know why I'm bitching about it. I'm getting paid to do it. Well, that's greedy, but at least I have my motivation back.

REALLY FUNNY