I’m not going to lie. Being drunk is fun. The after-effect is fucking awful, but the good feeling (which I usually call “buzzed”) is absolutely wonderful. I do fear alcohol, but I have to remember that you can’t live your life in fear. Reality just sometimes feels so in place that getting out of place sometimes creates mental stability. It creates head, liver and stomach instability, but everything has consequences. As far as acting stupid, fuck it. The only thing that matters is if you feel good. Of course this is sober Will talking, who has finally recovered from a fairly-bad hangover. Yesterday, I probably was in the mood to never drink again, but in all honesty, you get kicked off the horse, you get back on. Or maybe just find another horse. Let’s say that a Jager Horse knocks you off very hard, well there’s always the Grey Goose Horse waiting to be ridden, so….. saddle up cowboy! I just figure that later on in life, I’m going to be old and miserable and so I want to have fun while I still am financially, mentally and physically able. I do understand the risks of becoming an alcoholic, which is good. Most people don’t even understand the risks, which puts them a step ahead towards alcoholism. Either that or I’m just saying that to justify the fact I still want to drink. I don’t know… It’d a difficult subject. One in fact, that I need a drink in order to talk about. Haha. Anyways, while I’m on the subject of drunkenness, here’s a clip from John Cassavetes’ “Husbands.” I don’t know what to say about it, but watch it.
Monday, December 8, 2008
Drunkenness Is A Warm Gun
Season Finale
Today felt like a season finale in a television show. Most good TV shows always have a good season finale with unique qualities. The main one present is that everything is coming to an end. This is in regards to the production of the show, but also the action taking place within the show. It seems that today, being the last full length day of school really felt like the perfect ending to a TV show. In the Writing Center, everything felt different. It was the first time we all crowded around the front table and just had fun. There were probably ten people turned away who needed help. Just kidding. We managed to tutor some people in our fun time, but failed to do our job in recording the required paperwork. Yes, it was great, because we all connected at the party (some of us more than others) and that togetherness followed through to the final work day. Maybe the fact it was our last day played a major role in this. I never really liked the crowd well enough to hang out, but today was a lot of fun. Just like a season finale, you never want it to end, but you know it's coming. That's how today felt. Dr. Janssen was exceptionally nice to us today. It was, in a way, almost creepy. He shared a story with Amy and myself about his college days in Athens, which really created a whole new awkwardness. I really do see myself going over to his place and jamming with “the guys.” I cannot picture “hanging out” with professors, but it would be neat to kick back with Tony, David, Ed, and Bob (the janitor in the Academic Building, whom Dr. Janssen tells me plays blues on a mean banjo). Just kidding. I could play with them, but never do the first name thing. Anyways, as the day slowly came to an end, one by one, an employee would say their goodbyes and make their exit until it was down to just me. Actually, it was down to Mr. Higgins, Derrek, and myself. I didn’t have the cinematic moment I hoped for. I would be the last one there, push in all the chairs, close the blinds, turn our the lights, and just as I would shut the door, I’d turn around and say, “Goodbye.” As cheesy as it sounds, I really am going to miss that place as well as Gordon College in general. I realized today that I’ve spent three years there. That’s almost the length of high school, which was an eternity. It just seems like the end, but I keep forgetting that in all honesty, it’s the beginning. I shook Tony’s hand and said my goodbye. But something was still missing. I made a great contribution to the theatre department and I felt like a mark in my honor was necessary. What, if Truet Cathy can have the rock hard eagle statue in the lobby, I can leave my mark. So, I took some leftover paint, climbed on a table and wrote my name and date on the theatre workshop tool-room wall. Afterwards, it felt really good. And so, I left the theatre for the last time. Here’s a picture of it:
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Last night, while in my frustrating project/study binge, I received a text message from Dan. He demanded an explanation regarding the fact no one has received their Rocky Horror DVD's. I ignored it and continued studying. A few minutes later, I received another from Jenna, again regarding the DVD's, also mentioning that Dan had just asked her. I ignored it again, but a few more minutes later, I received another text, this time from John Wright, and yes, he also asked about the Rocky DVD's. I finally turned my phone off, because I literally was getting angry. So, this morning, I woke up early, went to the Post Office in Hampton and shipped my only two copies of Rocky Horror to Dan in Arizona. Now it's his problem. If people want to keep badgering me about it, I'll simply tell them to take it up with Dan, because it's not my problem anymore. Now it's up to him to make copies and ship them individually to everyone. Anyways, that added to my frustration last night. It payed off, because today my journal looked fantastic, and I also scored a 92 on my Astronomy test. Today also was my last day in Water Basketball. I scored five goals and played my hardest. I finally scored for the first time in a while. It took me about three misses, but then I scored from quite a distance. Coach even yelled, "That a boy, Will! Go Will!" It was great. My strongest position is defensive guard. Ask anyone in that class and they will tell you I play a mean defense. The best thing to do is instill fear into your opponent and then do whatever it takes to get the ball away from them. When doing so, sometimes my arms reach around their backs and a foul is called. I received three of those today. One I even argued over with the coach. The best part about today was at one point when I tried to rebound the ball at the goal, something happened. Either the ball came down and hit me in the face, or an opponent accidentally swung his elbow into my head. Whichever the case being, I have a nice bruised eye. It's actually more on the side of my eye and runs up to my forehead. I'm keeping ice on it, so tomorrow it should look awesome.
In other news, I think I'm getting more serious about making this short. I want to say that sometime not next week, but the week after, I'm hoping to get some shooting done. Hopefully next weekend, after school is out, I can sit down with Josh and Jenna and give them what I've written and see if they can improvise with it. I want to experiment with some written dialogue and some ad-libbed. I've talked to Kirk and Will and they said it's fine that I shoot in their apartment. Will is going into film also and wants to be a cinematographer. Maybe I'll let him shoot part of it as compensation. Anyways, everything seems to be falling in line, and so I'm afraid that I'll screw everything up again and nothing will get done.
I found a guy online who sells bootleg DVDs: everything from cult to unreleased classics. I bought two unreleased John Cassavetes movies: Husbands and Love Streams. I figure if Cassavetes was alive, he probably wouldn't mind that I'm going out of my way to see his two films. Not to mention the only reason the two films haven't been released is because the Studios have the rights, but just refuse put it out. Cassavetes is probably rolling in his grave.
Tomorrow I have my health class in the gym. Another three mile run on the treadmill.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Once again, I will end up pouting about my failure to successfully accomplish the completion of a short film. The reason of this is because today is the Georgia State film showcase festival, which I could be attending much less submitted a film. I'm of course being responsible by working and going to class tonight. I could have easily faked a sickness and got someone to cover me, but it just seems like too much work. Kind of similar to the excuse I give for not making a film now. This festival marks yet another opportunity passing before me.
I did however write a short script this weekend. Saturday night, after my plants to attend "The Crawling Eye" fell apart, I ended up going out, buying Kuhlua, and after four White Russians, I finished a short script. I wanted to write something that felt real and that people around my age might be able to relate to. I wanted to show the struggles of being young, and yet slowing moving into adulthood. How the entire world seems tiny, but once actually seeing it, the world appears actually quite large. I don't know. I'm really making it sound ridiculous and it probably doesn't qualify for comparison to that description. I just wanted to put off sleep and write something. I bet I can shoot it. The problem is if I will do it. It's a simple two maybe three character story with very minimum locations, probably only one. I can use Kirk and Will's apartment to shoot the whole thing. Maybe I should really get serious for once. My frustration is becoming annoying.
I had better study. Time for blogging later...
Sunday, November 30, 2008
An unfortunate event occurred this past Tuesday night at the Plaza showing of "The Big Lebowski." A person (whom is not worthy of a name) decided to sit directly in front of me. His other friends filled up the remaining row. During the pre-show, these people decided to exchange pictures of the female genitalia on their cell phones. The feedback given was embarrassing. It was really disgusting, but didn't stop there. Once the movie began, the guy leaned back and for some reason his seat was broken, therefore extended further than others in the row. So, here I was, this guy practically in my lap, so he decides to rock the chair back and forth. For the first part, I just changed my position away from his chair, but after the position became uncomfortable, I decided to go back the way I was. My legs, not extended more than usual, were hit over and over again by the rocking seat. I thought if I let his seat his my legs for a little while, he'd notice and stop..... he didn't. Instead, he decided to mumble something like, "That's your leg," and went back rocking. As if this wasn't enough, he yelled out obscene phrases throughout the film and cheered for naked women. Frankly, I was not only repulsed, but offended by his apparent rudeness. I couldn't think of anything to do at the time. Actually, I sincerely thought about killing him, something that probably wouldn't be worth it with all the mess, but I really do think he does not deserve to live. What good can come from this person's life? When Amy got up to go to the bathroom, the chair hit her as well. Knowing what I know now, I should have just went and told the manager. I'm pretty sure that Amy and myself weren't the only people disgusted by this asshole. Maybe I should have told the manager the person was kidding with his friends about setting the carpet on fire, and that I saw him playing with a matchstick. The reason I have given the identity of "person" is because I'm ashamed to call him a man or guy. People like this person is what gives my sex a bad name. The problem is if I took out all the disgusting persons out of the "men" category, then I'd be very lonely. That's how sad this is.
On my way to and from St. Simons, I came across several billboards, one in which read in large bold letters "WE BARE ALL." Others were for Hooters, including a scantily dressed woman and hot wings. These billboards make me sick. Everything from advertisements to forms of art exposing women as objects. I really cannot put into words how offended I am, not as a man, but at a human being. I can just see guys driving down the road and get such a joy from seeing the billboard, which I don't know if the company or the consumer is more at fault. I'm of course only speaking my opinion, without facts. The marketing campaign could be run by a woman, but I just feel like it's more likely a man coming up with ideas of exposing a woman for financial gain. But there are women who knowingly expose themselves merely for the money and care less about self-image. I feel that a woman has the right to do whatever she wants to with her body, everything from abortion to prostitution, just as long as I don't have to see it on a billboard.
I just don't see how men could have fun sharing pictures of vaginas or how women get together and compare dildos. What happened to this world? Are these people just sad? Is there something missing in their lives and they have to fill an empty hole with useless desires? The more they fill, the lonelier they'll become. I don't have the answers to these questions, because I cannot understand them. It's something I really don't care to understand, which probably will result in never understanding.
I am of course, probably talking about a low percentage of people. I'm terrible at statistics, but I can only hope it's a low percentage.
If I ever come across that person again, I don't know what I'll do. Maybe not kill him, just take a baseball bat to his knees. Just kidding... I do know people though...
Thanksgiving
While sitting at the table with my relatives, the question came up: "What are you thankful for?" After the question was asked, I stopped and thought for a second. I raised my glass of wine with my relatives and announced my thankfulness for a new president, one in which overcame dreadful obstacles and is now our new president. I received a great response: in fact everyone agreed with me. I could not have said that at the table with my other family. The fact I could say it without receiving dirty looks or laughs is what I'm truly thankful for. I know this is late, but Happy Thanksgiving!
